The truck that swerved to miss the stroller in which I slept.
My mother turning from the laundry basket just in time to see me open the third-story window to call to the cat.
In the car, on ice, something spinning and made of history snatched me back from the guardrail and set me down between two gentle trees. And that time I thought to look both ways on the one-way street.
And when the doorbell rang, and I didn’t answer, and just before I slipped one night into a drunken dream, I remembered to blow out the candle burning on the table beside me.
It's a miracle, I tell you, this middle-aged woman scanning the cans on the grocery store shelf. Hidden in the works of a mysterious clock are her many deaths, and yet the whole world is piled up before her on a banquet table again today. The timer, broken. The sunset smeared across the horizon in the girlish cursive of the ocean, Forever, For You.
And still she can offer only her body as proof:
The way it moves a little slower every day. And the cells, ticking away. A crow pecking at a sweater. The last hour waiting patiently on a tray for her somewhere in the future. The spoon slipping quietly into the beautiful soup.
-- Laura Kasischke
And to clarify about the photo (Elaine thought it was perhaps Aidan?)but it's me (baby dyke, dressed in my brother's hand-me-down cowboy shirt that I wore until it was threadbare, I loved it that much). I'm posed at the controls of a steam engine, probably a Big Boy, one of the last great late forays into steam before diesel took over. My father found great pleasure in exploring old train yards, and since we were his family, he dragged us along. As a result, there are many more photos of my brother and I posed in front of behemoth train engines than of us in front of Christmas trees. In hindsight, that's just fine with me.
ReplyDelete